When March Madness and General Conference Combine: Mormon Madness

About a week ago I enjoyed the General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  To those who may not be familiar with what General Conference is, I will explain.  It is a semi-annual conference where all the leaders of the Mormon Church, to which I belong, speak and give counsel and guidance.  It's a great event, and one of the few times I can watch so much TV without feeling completely unproductive.  You can read, listen to, or watch any talk online.

As I watched I started to think of which discourse was my favorite, and in my mind I envisioned a giant tournament in which the talks were pitted against each other until finally one winner was left standing.  A la college basketball's March Madness.  I love March Madness.  And I love General Conference.  How could I go wrong?  So it was that the first semi-annual Mormon Madness bracket was created.

This took a really long time to make.  Longer than I thought it would.

How it Works

• General Conference is split up into five general sessions: Saturday morning, Saturday afternoon, Sunday morning, Sunday afternoon, and the Priesthood session.
• Each quarter of the bracket (heretofore referred to as regions) corresponds to one of those sessions, except the Priesthood session.  Thus we have the Saturday morning, Saturday afternoon, Sunday morning, and Sunday afternoon regions.  
• Each region consists of eight discourses.  Where one session did not have eight discourses to fill up the region, the empty spots were randomly populated with talks from the Priesthood session. In the bracket, the names of the speakers from those sessions are followed by a (PS), standing, of course, for Priesthood session.  Short, informational talks were not included (for example, President Monson's opening and closing remarks).  
• Seeding is determined in accordance with the seniority of the speaker: Prophet, First Presidency, Apostle, and then Other.  When two people of the same category are in the same bracket, the higher seed is he or she who has held the position for the longest time.  
• The winners were determined by me.  The criteria for determining the winner was simply which talk I liked more.  So it's totally biased.  If you disagree with one or all of my selections, so be it.  In the future (because I will now be doing this every six months at conference time), I may consider a different method of determining the winner.  But for now, what I say goes.
• The quote at the end of each region review below comes from the winning talk.

That being said, let's dive right in to determine the greatest talk from the October 2012 General Conference.  

Saturday Morning

In what was the strongest of the four regions, President Eyring's talk from Priesthood session advanced to the Final Four. Putting that talk over President Uchtdorf's Saturday morning address was the most difficult decision of the bracket, but I had to go with my gut.  I realize that there are many of you who may not have had a chance to listen to President Eyring's talk due to the fact that it was given during the Priesthood session.  If that is the case, I urge you to go and watch it.  I say watch and not read because I love how President Eyring wears his emotions on his sleeve when he speaks. It's much more powerful to listen and watch the talk as opposed to simply reading it.  Other notable occurences include Shayne M. Bowen's upset of Elder Nelson, the 3-seed.  I loved how personal Elder Bowen got when he talked about the child that he lost to premature death. Very emotional.  

"Every person is different and has a different contribution to make.  No one is destined to fail.  As you seek revelation to see gifts God sees in those you lead - particularly the young - you will be blessed to lift their sights to the service they can perform.  With your guidance, those you lead will be able to see, want, and believe they can achieve their full potential for service in God's kingdom."

Saturday Afternoon

The Saturday Afternoon region had one of two first round Apostle matchups, as Elder Ballard and Elder Andersen went head-to-head.  Elder Ballard gets the nod and the eventual trip to the Final Four with his talk about charity and service.  Elder Oaks also gave a great talk about children in this session.  If there was ever an Apostle who is stone-faced and who doesn't get emotional, it's Elder Oaks.  However, did anyone else catch him getting a little choked up when he related a story that Elder Holland had given at a recent CES fireside?  That was nice.  I like it when the speakers are more sensitive and expressive.  Although I loved Elder Oaks' talk, he had a very difficult first round matchup against Elder Robert C. Gay over whom he barely prevailed.  Elder Gay gave the best non-Apostle talk of the session.  

"How do we ingrain the love of Christ into our hearts?  There is one simple daily practice that can make a difference for every member of the Church ... That simple practice is this: In your morning prayer each new day, ask Heavenly Father to guide you to recognize an opportunity to serve one of His precious children.  Then go throughout the day with your heart full of faith and love, looking for someone to help."

Sunday Morning

The Sunday Morning region was another very tough region with yet another Apostle-Apostle first round meeting (Elder Holland vs. Elder Christofferson).  As a surprise to none, we see Elder Holland (or as I lovingly call him, the Bulldog) taking this region by storm.  His great talk about devotion and discipleship pushed him into the Final Four.  I could literally watch Elder Holland for all ten hours of conference and love every minute.  He's that good. That being said, his path to the Final Four was not an easy one. In the process he had to beat out the Prophet and also President Eyring's great address about adversity and the pavilions we unconsciously erect to keep God out of our lives.  Elder Holland stopped what might have been one of the craziest moments in the history of Mormon Madness, one in which President Eyring could potentially have gone up against himself in the championship round.  Although a matchup featuring two talks by the same speaker was avoided here, I'm praying it will happen in future tournaments.  The suspense and drama would be unbelievable.  

"'If ye love me, keep my commandments,' Jesus said.  So we have neighbors to bless, children to protect, the poor to lift up, and the truth to defend.  We have wrongs to make right, truths to share, and good to do.  In short, we have a life of devoted discipleship to give in demonstrating our love of the Lord. We can't quit and we can't go back.  After an encounter with the Son of the living God, nothing is ever again to be as it was before.  The Crucifixion, Atonement, and Resurrection of Jesus Christ mark the beginning of a Christ life, not the end of it."

Sunday Afternoon

While it's always difficult to have Elder Scott lose, Elder Bednar stole the fourth and final spot in the Final Four with his talk about conversion.  Also, in the biggest upset of the tournament, Elder Russell T. Osguthorpe took down the 1-seed President Uchtdorf. Sadly, this has less to do with the greatness of Elder Osguthorpe's talk and more to do with how sleepy I was during President Uchtdorf's Priesthood address, although Elder Osguthorpe did give a good discourse.  This is just one example of the many biases and problems with the method I am using to determinine who advances and who does not.  Nonetheless, it is what it is and Sunday afternoon belonged to Elder Bednar, he of the impeccable hair.

"The essence of the gospel of Jesus Christ entails a fundamental and permanent change in our very nature made possible through the Savior's Atonement.  True conversion brings a change in one's beliefs, heart, and life to accept and conform to the will of God and includes a conscious commitment to become a disciple of Christ ... Conversion requires all of our heart, all of our might, and all of our mind and strength."

The Final Four

In the first installment of Mormon Madness we have an all-Apostle Final Four (although President Eyring is in the First Presidency, he is still considered an Apostle).  Eyring-Ballard compete for Saturday, while Holland-Bednar compete for Sunday.  Here's how it all went down:

Elder Holland is the Kentucky of Mormon Madness.  You almost expect him to win each and every six months, and he in no way disappointed this October.  His talk was entitled The First Great Commandment, and in it he appealed to all of us to become better followers and disciples of Jesus Christ.  It is through devoted discipleship and obeying the commandments that we show the Savior our love.  Elder Holland recounted the experience of Jesus Christ and Peter, when Peter was asked three times by the Savior whether he loved Him. Each time Peter answered with an emphatic "yes". Elder Holland, hypothetically speaking as the Savior, then paraphrased what the Lord might have meant when, in response, he told Peter to "feed my sheep":

"Then Peter, why are you here?  Why are we back on this same shore, by these same nets, having this same conversation? Wasn't it obvious then and isn't it obvious now that if I want fish, I can get fish?  What I need, Peter, are disciples - and I need them forever.  I need someone to preach my gospel and defend my faith.  I need someone who loves me, truly, truly loves me, and loves what our Father in Heaven has commissioned me to do.  Ours is not a feeble message.  It is not a fleeting task.  It is not hapless; it is not hopeless; it is not to be consigned to the ash heap of history.  It is the work of Almighty God, and it is to change the world."

I read that and I wonder if I've shown my love for the Savior enough.  If Peter, the chief Apostle had miles to go and many more people to help, where am I?  If the Lord asked me if I loved him, could I respond with a confident "yes"?  Elder Holland taught that the crowning characteristic of love is always loyalty, and I need to look at how loyal I am, how devoted I am, and if I have been changed by the Atonement of Christ.  We should all ask ourselves these questions from time to time as we take inventory of our lives.  The call to discipleship that Elder Holland made in this last Conference reminded me of a different Elder Holland address which has now been turned into a Mormon Message on YouTube:

  

It would be good for all of us to figure out where we are, and how we can become more faithful to the Savior.  I love the plea from Elder Holland towards the end of that video, and with that I will leave you:

"May we declare ourselves to be more fully disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ, not in word only and not only in the flush of comfortable times but in deed and courage and in faith, including when the path is lonely and when our cross is difficult to bear.  This week and always, may we stand by Jesus Christ 'at all times and in all things, and in all places that [we] may be in', even until death, for surely that is how he stood by us, when it was unto death and when he had to stand entirely and utterly alone."

A Toast to Utah: Farewell, Old Friend

Ten hours, three boxes of Altoids, two Mountain Dews and forty-seven Peachios later, I've arrived in California, leaving behind Utah indefinitely to begin full-time work.  The fact that I won't be going back hasn't sunk in yet, and it might not for a while.  It's sad to leave behind the place I've lived in for 20 of my 26 years of life, but it's also exciting to begin my career and to begin real life (I still call it real life even though I'm living at my parents' house).

When people asked me what I'd miss most about Utah besides friends and family, I couldn't really think of much.  In fact, the only answer I came up with was basketball.  You can always count on finding good ball in Provo.  This led me to the thought that Utah, like anywhere I might live, is only as good as the people I find there.  I won't miss Utah for its mountains, because I'll have the beach.  I won't miss Utah for its weather, because I hate the snow.  I won't miss Utah for its attractions, because I have the feeling that California offers a lot more.  I'll miss Utah because of all the people I care for who I am leaving behind. Unfortunately, you can't always take those you love with you wherever you go.

So although it's depressing to say goodbye, I feel like I made the most of this last summer with those people.  I went to Kanarraville, Utah to see a solar eclipse.  I went camping, went to a rodeo and to multiple carnivals.  I beat down two pinatas and I painted for the first time since Elementary school.  I started this blog, went wedding crashing and won the Bachelorette TV series  competition.  I went on trips to Boise, California, and Seattle.  I passed my CPA tests and I loved more than I ever had before.  It was a great summer.

Last Monday was my final night in Utah, and it was an emotional one.  I hadn't expected the goodbye to hurt so much and be so hard.  Yet there I was, crying like a little girl in the arms of someone I love. Besides the pain associated with leaving, I had some other thoughts during that night.  One thought had to do, of course, with vulnerability (what would one of my blog posts be without mentioning vulnerability?).  Leaving was so difficult because of how deeply I cared about the people I was leaving behind.  This summer I opened myself up and made myself more emotionally available than any other time in my life.  Because of that I felt like I was able to feel happiness greater than ever before, yet on the other hand, it made it hurt that much more when I had to say goodbye.  Brene Brown teaches that the risk of letting "ourselves become vulnerably seen", as she puts it, is that while we open ourselves up to experience real feelings of joy, we are also in danger of feeling real pain.  I experienced that, and it did hurt.  Yet in the process I realized that feeling is in no way a negative experience.  It only meant that I was alive.  It meant that I could feel.  It meant that I was capable of loving and being loved in return.  It meant that I had lived and given all of myself, and although it hurt in the end, I was better for it.  That's what being human is all about!  We're here on earth to build relationships and have real, deep connections with people, connections that only come about when we really invest all of ourselves.  That's one of the most, if not the most, important parts of the human experience, yet we're all so scared to do it because we're scared of "getting hurt", and because of that fear we hold back. We only invest a part of ourselves.  We risk no more than what is comfortable.  In the end, we might not feel as much pain.  But living that way will never bring us real happiness. The only path to true joy is the one marked by the risk of hurt.

If there was one who walked that kind of path and who epitomized vulnerability, it was Christ.  He literally gave all of Himself on our behalf without any guarantee of reciprocation. In fact, He even knew that many people for whom He would suffer would reject Him.  Yet He went through with it anyway.  He didn't stop to count the cost or ask who would love Him in return. Christ's Atonement was the most vulnerable act in all of human history.  I believe that one of the reasons Christ is able to love so purely and feel so deeply for us is precisely because of that vulnerability.  Investing so much of Himself in us exposes Him to great pain, like the kind we read about in Moses 7, where the Lord "looked upon the residue of the people, and He wept" because of their wickedness.  Yet, at the same time, that vulnerability also allows Him to feel great, indescribable joy - the kind which we read about in 3 Nephi 17, where, due to the faith of the people, the Savior weeps because his "joy [was] full."  If we are to be Christlike, we must learn to become as vulnerable as He did.  We must learn to give ourselves to others, to love like crazy without guarantees, and even to cry when we are let down.  We shouldn't run from those feelings and try to avoid them, for they are the very emotions to which we should aspire, and that are most reminiscent of Christ.

So as I say farewell to Utah, I do so with mixed feelings.  I am sad to leave behind people I care about, yet I am thankful that I feel for them so much I cry.  I feel grateful for the chances I've had to learn to love, and to receive love.  I'm thankful I was able to experience humanity.  I'm appreciative to all of the people who made Utah what it was to me.  It's really to them, and not to Utah, that I say goodbye.  So instead of "So long, Utah", what I'm really saying is, "Take luck Jim."  "God speed Bones."  "See you later Brian."  "Bye Em.  I miss you."  And it's those kinds of people to whom I'll raise my glass in farewell.

      

My Near Disaster with the CPAs

As many of you know, a large portion of my summer has been dedicated to taking the CPA exams.  Three down, one to go, and I can't wait to be done with them. However, getting the third test out of the way proved to be much more stressful and nerve-racking than it should have been.  Allow me to explain.

I scheduled my third test to be taken in California at the end of August.  I arrived in California late on Sunday, and my test was scheduled for Thursday.  I put in the hours of study I felt I needed the next three days, and when Wednesday night rolled around I took some time to get everything ready for my exam the next morning. During that process I remembered the strict identification requirements the CPA testing centers have.  They require either a) a current driver's license, or b) a current passport.  You might be thinking, "That's no problem.  You drove from Utah to California.  Surely you have a driver's license."  You would be right.  However, that license had been expired for more than a month, and who brings their passport when they visit home for a weekend?  So it was that Wednesday night I realized that I most likely would not be able to take my test.  

This is why that realization was so traumatic to me:

1) First, it’s important to understand how the CPA examination process works.  Every third month is an off-month, which means that no tests can be taken.  September happened to be an off-month, meaning that if I didn’t get my test taken in August, I’d have to wait until at least October.  However, my fourth test was scheduled for October, which meant that, realistically, I’d have to wait until November to take my missed test.  At that point I would have started work, and one of the worst scenarios I can imagine is doing accounting all day only to come home and study more accounting.  I wanted to avoid the work/study combination at all costs.  

2) I had spent the entire month of August studying for this specific exam.  Three hours a day, six days a week equals roughly 72 hours of studying – all of that would be thrown out the window.  The nature of the CPA exam is to study, learn, and then forget as quickly as possible.  There wouldn’t be a chance remembering anything I had learned two months down the road, especially when the subject is Auditing.

RIP Mom's vacuum and calculator I'd had for four years.

Thus I found myself in quite the conundrum.  I still had a last-minute solution I thought might save me.  My brother could photocopy my passport, send it to me and I could use that.  A call to the CPA examination center Thursday morning made it clear that wasn’t an option.  It was at this point that the expletives came out in full force and things were thrown and, in some cases, broken.

My mother then wondered if we could call my brother and fly him in from Utah with my passport. That was a very drastic measure, and I didn't want to reach that point until I tried my second brilliant solution, which was calling the DMV and seeing if I could renew my license in the three hours I had before my test.  I told my mom, who had the ticket pulled up and ready to be purchased, to wait until I finished talking to the DMV.  As you can guess, that wasn't an option either, because they ALSO need more identification that just an expired driver's license.  

The final solution was to buy my brother Brian a plane ticket and fly him out to California.  But Thursday was a day that just kept on giving: from the time my mother suggested buying a plane ticket to the time I got off the phone with the DMV (a period of about 15 minutes), the price of the round-trip plane ticket had jumped from around $300 to $500.  My 15 minute phone call cost me $200.

But at least it looked like I was going to be able to take my test.  Brian's flight was scheduled to land at 12:09.  My test was at 12:30.  Luckily, they give you a 30 minute window in which to arrive, so I had until 1:00.  The plane landed at 12:16, but of course there was traffic at the "arrivals" section of the airport.  Three lanes had conveniently been cut down to one.  When I finally got the pick-up zone, Brian informed me that he was actually upstairs at the "departures" section of the airport (where there was no traffic).  However, he ended up getting downstairs quickly, and I got my passport and headed off to take my test.  At 12:53 I walked into the testing center, seven minutes until my window would have closed.  I was able to take my test, so I guess all is well that ends well.

It was a crazy 24 hours that took another 24 to recover from, but there are lessons to be learned from this experience:

1. Don't ever let your driver's license expire.  
Trust me.

2. There are people who love you and care about you.
I was an absolute pain to deal with Wednesday night and Thursday morning.  But my mom stuck with me through it all, she laughed and rolled her eyes at how angry I was getting, and she helped me resolve my dilemma.  She did all that even when I broke her trusted vacuum.  She's a saint.  And then my brother, with absolutely no notice, dropped all he had on his schedule for two days to help me out when I needed it.  In both cases, what was important to me (taking my test) was important to them because they love me.  It's been said that a thousand words will not leave so deep an impression as one deed, and in this case their two deeds left a greater impression on me than thousands of words would have.  In tough times, there are always people, whether we believe it or not, who love us enough to help.  

3. Don't just endure - endure well. 
When the test had been taken and life continued on as it had, I looked back at the experience and asked why it couldn't have happened differently.  Why couldn't I have remembered my passport?  Why couldn't the plane ticket have stayed the same price?  Why did there have to be traffic at the airport?  It seemed that there was one hiccup after another, and it seemed like God was kind of piling it on.  The end result would have been the same with or without all the bumps in the road: I would have taken my test.  So why did I have to go through all the frustration and stress? I understood it was a life test (not a CPA one), and there were things I had to learn and experience I had to gain.  I then asked myself if I had passed the test (once again, not the CPA one) that had been placed before me.  The fact that I had made it to the testing center and had taken my CPA test was no indication of passing this other test.  What came to mind was something Henry B. Eyring said of the these kinds of difficulties we encounter:

"The test a loving God has set before us is not to see if we can endure difficulty.  It is to see if we can endure it well."

I had endured the difficulty.  Things had been thrown my way, but I took my test in the end.  But I don't think I endured the difficulty all that well.  I lost my temper, was quick to anger, and cursed more than I have in a while (and if you've known me for some time, you know it must have been a lot).  Hopefully I've learned enough so that the next time frustrations come I can be more patient and have more faith.

4. Everything works out.
In the moment of our disappointments and trials, we may think they are too great and even impossible to overcome.  But things have a way of working out.  I love this quote by the late Gordon B. Hinckley:

"It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is.  It all works out.  Don't worry.  I say that to myself every morning.  It will all work out.  Put your trust in God, and move forward in faith and confidence in the future.  The Lord will not forsake us.  He will never forsake us.  If we put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers."

Although it's easier said than done, we must come to believe that our adversity will be but a small moment, and that things get better.  When I think of the things I struggle with and the disappointments I experience, I sometimes recall a certain man in John 5, who "had an infirmity thirty and eight years."  Thirty eight years. Can you believe that?  We get upset if our internet is down for thirty eight minutes or if our commute is longer than thirty eight miles.  If there was ever a man who had reason to lose faith, it might have been that guy.  Yet he had enough faith that Christ could heal him.  I think of him and I realize that there will be things in my life that aren't solved as quickly as I'd like, and there may be things that I have to go through and deal with for a long time.  The important thing is that we never lose faith, no matter how bad it seems at the moment.  Dieter Uchtdorf taught this when he said:

"No matter how bleak the chapter of our lives may look today, because of the life and sacrifice of Jesus Christ, we may hope and be assured that the ending of the book of our lives will exceed our grandest expectations ... And to all who suffer, to all who feel discouraged, worried, or lonely, I say with love and deep concern for you, never give in.  Never surrender.  Never allow your despair to overcome your spirit."

It's a beautiful doctrine that the Atonement of Jesus Christ will set everything right. All the seeming injustices that we experience will be made right.  We will understand the answers to all the times we questioned God and asked "Why?".  The Atonement will reconcile it all: from our sins to our disappointments to our griefs. It will be alright in the end.  Remember the words of Corrie Ten Boom: "No pit is so deep that He is not deeper still."

The scores of messages and quotes that could be posted about this subject are too many, so I will end my writing here.  But consider the following media/quotes as an appendix to this post, with some of my favorite related messages.

Good Things to Come: My favorite Mormon Message, by Jeffrey R. Holland

Joel Burns: It Gets Better - I recently came across this and was very moved by his speech.  Joel Burns is a homosexual politician in Texas, and he gave this speech directed toward lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender youth, encouraging them to hold on and that life gets better.  It was something he learned from his own experience.

Brad Paisley: Letter to Me - One of my favorite songs with a great message.

Some of my favorite quotes on the subject:

From Jeffrey R. Holland: "Some of you may wonder: Is there any future for me?  What does a new year or a new semester, a new major or a new romance, a new job or a new home hold for me?  Will I be safe? Will life be sound?  Can I trust in the Lord and in the future?  Or would it be better to go back, to stay in the past?  To all such of every generation, I call out, 'Remember Lot's wife.'  Faith is for the future. Faith builds upon the past but never longs to stay there.  Faith trusts that God has great things in store for each of us and that Christ truly is the 'high priest of good things to come'.  Keep your eyes on your dream, however distant and far away.  Live to see the miracles of repentance and forgiveness, of trust and divine love that will transform your life today, tomorrow, and forever."

From David A. Bednar: "The Savior has suffered not just for our iniquities but also for the inequality, the unfairness, the pain, the anguish, and the emotional distresses that so frequently beset us. There is no physical pain, no anguish of soul, no suffering of spirit, no infirmity or weakness that you or I ever experience during our mortal journey that the Savior did not experience first.  You and I in a moment of weakness may cry out, 'No one understands.  No one knows.'  No human being, perhaps, knows.  But the Son of God perfectly knows and understands, for He felt and bore our burdens before we ever did.  And because He paid the ultimate price and bore that burden, He has perfect empathy and can extend to us His arm of mercy in so many phases of our life.  He can reach out, touch, succor - literally run to us - and strengthen us to be more than we could ever be and help us to do that which we could never do through relying only upon our own power."

From Thomas S. Monson: "I testify to you that our promised blessings are beyond measure. Though the storm clouds may gather, though the rains may pour down upon us, our knowledge of the gospel and our love of our Heavenly Father and of our Savior will comfort and sustain us as we walk uprightly and keep the commandments.  There will be nothing in this world that can defeat us.  My beloved brothers and sisters, fear not.  Be of good cheer.  The future is as bright as your faith."